8/3/12

Silent 無聲

"Silent  無聲"  Model: Priscilla Tam




(English version & a close up image below ) 


生短句:


《無聲》


I

因為厭煩   
所以不自覺地把電話調至靜音


然而不再受聆聲來襲

反而更煩燥了


逃避 / 不是解決的方法

II



相比起以拳相對的血腥暴力


冷戰或許是成熟的表現




III



有人說無聲是最大的抗議


但當對方得寸進尺

毫無羞恥之心


你真想咒罵他

用盡所有言語


咀咒他到地獄去





IV



沈默是金


金是沈默




V



胃酸刺激著貪妄的無底洞 / 飢腸轆轆


枯黃的牙齒在發癢

難以忍受


偏偏聲線被毀壞了


無法發出一絲聲音




VI



默劇


沒有配樂 / 沒有配音


不再存在的娛樂

VII



有人自殺了


沒留下一份遺書


有人被殺了


沒留下一句遺言


就這樣


無聲無息地消失了




VIII



靜夜


他走到街上


難得的平和




他看到迎面而來的人


嘴巴一張一合 / 一張一合


才發現

世界並沒有靜下來


只是他再也聽不見




IX



事不關己


己不勞心


無需發聲


拒絕發言




X



腐敗


在人民無法出聲的政制下


孕育


茁壯成長

Inspired poems:


"Silent"
(translated by Jaime Chu: j----me.tumblr.com)
 

I

I set my phone to silent
because enough is enough
Yet it
is more disquieting not to hear it ring
Evasion solves nothing


II

A cold war seems more mature
in the face of gore and violence and fists


III

Someone says silence is the best protest
But when the other side inches
forward without shame
There is only one desire to curse
with all of language
until he sinks into hell


IV

Silence is golden
Gold is silent


V

Acid bites into the black hole of greed and it growls
Teeth, dry and yellowed, itch
Unbearable but
the vocal chord has been destroyed
There is no sound to be made


VI

Without music and without sound
Mime
is an entertainment that no longer exists


VII

Someone killed himself
without leaving a note
Someone was killed
without having last words
And this is how
people launch into thin air


VIII

It is a quiet night
He walks on the street
in a rare moment of pacificity

He sees the mouths of the oncoming pedestrians
gaping and closing, gaping and closing
and then realizes
it is not that the world has been silenced
but rather he could no longer hear


IX

Things that do not concern yourself do not need to be given
a word
a voice
a fuck


X

Decay
is born to the land where people are silenced
where it thrives 

a close up, i honestly think that this image is meant to be printed big...... >__<

7/30/12

One Night Alone






Photography: Andrea Pun
Make up / Hair: Yesenia Macias
Styling: Aiya Liu
Model: Alanna Gilbert @ Wünder Management

7/15/12

Caged 囚

-->
"Caged  囚"  (model: Justina Woo)

 (English version below)

洐生小說:



在灰矇矇的天色下,那一片淒迷昏黃的燈海淹沒了整個城市。

過於炫目刺眼的燈光,像是誇耀著當中的璀燦繁華,她瞇起眼睛,勉強能看到一個個在移動著的黑點。

聯想到他們是一群勞累奔波的人,為了糊口,腳步連一刻也不能停下來,她迷迷糊糊的想著,明明自己也曾經像他們一樣為了生活而焦慮不安,但這一切現在對她來說卻是如此的陌生

咯,咯。

靈敏的聽覺讓她一下子便能聽見從遠方傳來的聲音,從混沌的思緒抽身,回過神的時侯,那個人已經在她的面前,她趕忙在面上掛起一絲微笑,一雙杏眼直直的看著對方。

這些年來,那個人依然把頭髮梳得一絲不苛,衣物熨得筆直貼服,他在外表上似乎沒有什麼改變,但仔細一看,架在鼻樑上的眼鏡款式不同了,而在鏡框後看著她的眼神也一樣變了。

大概是感受到她那雖然不具威脅,卻明顯期待著什麼的目光,那個人立刻移開視線,瞬速放下晚飯,然後頭也不回地轉身離去。

不知是從哪時開始,他不再逗著自己,事事敷洐,眼神也不再熱刺。她深知箇中原因,但依然不斷裝傻,不斷找藉口逃避現實,自我安慰。

那個人放下的晚飯,依然精緻,但她卻失了胃口,食之無味。

或許自己已經過著足以讓同伴羨慕嫉妒的人生,畢竟從百花爭寵鬥艷中奪穎而出,從此不再需要捱艱抵餓。

那時侯雖然明知即將淪為禁臠,被褫奪自由,她心裡不是一樣雀躍期待,憧憬將來。

現在是過去的未來,這樣的未來──不再擔憂溫飽,但同時所有的喜怒哀樂也加附在一個人身上,對方一旦不再把注意力放在她身上,她便什麼也不是──既可笑又可悲。

雖然拚命不想成為一個怨婦,但她也真的倦了,眼眶卻是乾的,什麼也哭不出來。

無意識下,她的視線落在被外面的光線折射的閃閃發亮的金鎖,然後她才發現,原來自由近在咫尺。

呼吸瞬間變得凌亂,她巍顫地推了推門,金鎖瞬間落地。

呆愣半久,她才想起,自己可以揮動翅膀,輕而易舉地離開這所地方。

她曾是百鳥之后,但日復日年復年被人豢養的生活,不單讓她精神脫軌,如今居然連生存本能也忘得一乾二淨。

拖著如此疲憊的身軀,她早已飛不起來,想到這裡,她突然笑了,失心瘋般瘋狂地笑了,笑得比哭更難看,更哀戚。

她原以為囚禁著她的是一個鳥籠,但其實她的身體已被調教得殘缺不堪。

鳥籠外那片廣闊的天空也從此與她再無牽連。

-完-

Inspired Story:


Caged  

(translated by Jaime Chu: j----me.tumblr.com)

Under the dusky sky, a bleak and muddy yellow sea of light has flooded the city.

The piercing glare seems to be boasting of its bustling glory within. She squints, and vaguely makes out a few dark spots in motion, one after another.

People who are tired from their own restlessness, she thought, dazed. People who couldn’t afford to slow down for one second for the sake a warm meal at the end of the day. She used to be one of them, but now everything seems foreign.

Clack. Clack.

She hears two cackles from afar right away, thanks to her sensitive hearing. Tearing herself away from the muddle of thoughts, right when she returns to her senses, someone has already appeared before her. She hastens to put a smile on her face. She looks, with eyes shaped like hazelnuts, straight at him.

After all these years, his hair is still perfectly coiffed, his clothes still neatly pressed, he doesn't seem to have changed. But a closer inspection reveals that the pair of glasses hanging on the bridge of his nose are in a different style; and behind the frame, how he looks at her has also changed.

Perhaps perceiving the non-threatening, though clearly anticipating expression in her eyes, he immediately shifts his gaze. He quickly puts down the dinner, turns around, and leaves.

It isn’t clear when it started, but at some point, he has stopped kidding himself. He has stopped caring; he no longer has the same fire in his eyes. She knows the reason, but she pretends she doesn’t. She keeps looking for reasons to avoid the truth, to somehow make herself feel better.

The food that he has brought still looks exquisite. But she has lost her appetite. It has lost its taste.

Perhaps the life she is leading is enough for any of her peers to be jealous of. After all, in the game of survival of the most beautiful, she emerged triumphant. She never has to shiver or starve again.

At the time, even though she knew she would soon become forbidden goods, stripped of freedom, her heart was still full of excitement and anticipation, visions for the future.

The present is the future of the past. But this kind of future — where, though physical hunger is no longer a concern, her emotional health is now dependent on the attention of one person, where she is nothing if not something to him — is a farce and a tragedy.

She has tried hard not to turn bitter and sour, but she is tired. No tears would come out of her dried eyes.

Unconsciously, her gaze falls on the golden lock that is sparkling from the refraction of the lights outside. And then she realizes, freedom has always been this close.

Suddenly, her breath flutters. She pushes the door open with a tremble. The lock immediately falls to the ground.

Overcome by a trance, she then recovers and remembers: she has wings. So they begin to flap, and she leaves without looking back.

She was the queen of birds, but years after years of being taken care of this way has damaged her mind. She has also forgotten her instincts.

Dragging an exhausted body behind, she could no longer launch into mid-air. Suddenly, she laughs. She laughs like it would drain all the blood out of her heart. Her laughter has more sorrow than tears.

She has thought it was a cage that imprisoned her. But it was also her body that has learned to adapt, and has been compromised. The open sky outside the bird cage has stopped being her concern a long time ago.

-Finis

behind the scenes

I’m really scared of height, so every time when I'm shooting at somewhere high, I would need someone to stabilize my body, so special thanks to Jessie for all of the help on that day. (btw If everyone is into concert photography, you should go check out her work: http://www.jessielau.com/. :P she's a great concert photographer!)

This photo shoot meant a lot for me, not only because it was the first time the three of us (Jessie, Justina and I) did a shoot together (we all met in a harry potter online forum 10 years ago, long story, I'll get to that when I have time :P) but also it's the first image that I created with a story go with it.

Writing (Chinese) used to be my biggest hobby before I picked up the camera, therefore, I always wanted to write stories that can go with the images that I've created and the written stories are not supposed to illustrate the images literally; they could just have the hint of it, or contain the same atmosphere. I finally found myself to have the time / motivation / inspiration to try this idea and so far, I've enjoyed the process a lot and I hope some of you will enjoy it as well. (Unfortunately, there will be only Chinese version until someone is willing to do the translation. T__T) 

Update: (July 16):  
A friend of mine, Jaime, did a wonderful translation for the story! :D Thank you so much. I can't say enough.

6/4/12

June 4


It happened in Beijing 23 years ago. I wasn't even born yet, I used to not understand why so many people would go to Victoria Park for the candlelight vigil on June 4 year by year. Later, I learned about the incident from older generation, news, books and documentary videos. I could still feel the pain. It was cruel when our armies killed our unarmed students, and even more unforgivable when one (you know who) had been trying to deny the history and wipe off the memories for the past twenty-three years. Today, I went to Victoria Park, for the first time in my life, joining the other 180000 people - we were there to tell them that we didn't forget and up until today we were still seeking an official reassessment of the crackdown. 

What we believe is the truth, not lies.



Images from Hong Kong Yahoo News (2012-06-04):


  
Images from 1989 (unknown sources)



For the people who never heard about this incident, you can watch the following videos:




4/4/12

The Secret Garden



The Secret Garden

Photography: Andrea Pun 
Hair: Amanda Lyn 
Make up: Melissa Murdick 
Fashion Design and Styling: Aiya Liu 
Model: Angelina Maldonado (Q model)  

I did this photoshoot back in late Feb, thanks to my friend Vidiu for letting me to use his gears, I was able to set up a home studio. It was my first time of using non-"broncolor" strobes, I was pretty surprised that the quality of AlienBees. With its price, I think it's beyond expectation. Also, I really like how portable it is, as a female photographer, I always try to pack as light as possible. 

The idea of the shoot came from my broken skull,  I got this skull at a pretty early stage of my photography. It was one of the props that I've used the most (I used it so many times that I consider to named it T__T) and I've done a lot of self-portraits with it, for example: 


During one of the personal shoot last year, I dropped this skull accidentally and the top of its head got broken. I didn't want to throw it away, so I decided to put stuffs inside its head, therefore, one of the ideas came to life. From there, I decided to create a whole series of it, I started to draw sketches. Later, I met up with my stylist friend Aiya, and everything (like the direction of make up / hair...etc.) started coming to life.
 
All of the people from this team (except model) worked with me before, therefore, during the shoot, I can totally trust their skills and I loved the chemistry that we had as a team. I had to mention that the model Angelina was one of the youngest models I've ever photographed. She was only 12. I'm always amazed with models who can offer so much to a photographer at such a young age. 

This is also the first time I'm total in love with studio lighting, and I finally understand the beauty of artificial lights. :)

Some behind the scenes images: 

Amanda and Melissa were working at the same time, Angelina's hair took 2 hours to finish! (iphone image)
after 2.5 hours, Angelina's make up and hair were finally done :D! (iphone image)
setting up, was shooting in an almost empty bedroom (iphone image)
Amanda was modeling for the light test! (while Angelina was putting on the clothes)
Melissa was fixing Angelina's make up during the shoot
group picture!! :D

2/20/12

21

i can't believe i haven't blogged ANYTHING in 2012. T__T. i REALLY need to start reminding myself to blog more.

so early this month (Feb 7), i've turned 21, for those of you who wonder, i didn't celebrate my birthday with alcohol :P, in fact on that day, i did a personal shoot with Lush Flora in downtown LA. it was quite a last min photo shoot, therefore, i didn't plan a lot prior the shoot. i kept brain-storming when i was driving, finally when i arrived to her place, i saw a big fish tank, suddenly, i felt inspired, i knew that i needed to shoot with it... so here's the final image:

"a portrait of the drowned soul", model: Lush Flora
we also did couple shoots outside the place where she was staying, Flora was nice enough to allow me to shoot any concepts i want, so we did couple regular portraits, later, i asked her if i could photograph her in her underwear......well, we got into some kind of troubles, so by the end, we literally only got 3 mins to get the pic right, luckily i got the shot i needed:

"a daily routine", model: Lush Flora
there's a lot of decisions i would have to make this year, i hope it will be a great year even if it's not the easiest year.